Sunday, February 24th - Oscar Live Blog! (Updated Monday, February 25th)

I'm not doing a full post today because I'm pretty much wiped out from yesterday. I set my alarm for 6:20, but I must have turned it off because I didn't wake up until 7:30.

So anyway, it was fun doing the live blog. If you start at 7:30, I think you can see me getting progressively drunker. Of course, if you didn't watch the show, then the references to Gaydolf Titler, will probably seem like the ramblings of the village idiot.

Ah well, it is presented as is, though I did cleaned up some of the misspellings and such. My OCD wouldn't allow those to stand!

Back tomorrow!

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This is going to be pretty slow at first because I'm still cooking pizza and stuff for people, but it'll pick up...promise...and I'm drinking already!

12:05 - Okay, so I took a little time to farewell my guests. While I predicted that Juno would win, I'm not shocked that "No Country for Old Men" (the John McCain Story) won it all. My big problem with the Oscars is that all of the pictures nominated didn't really make all that much money. Sure, I understand that art and commerce do not always intersect, but the last big Oscar show was the year Titanic won (10 years ago), and maybe they should consider a little more mainstream fair. I dunno....I'm drunk. Don't listen to me :)!
11:31 - Wow.....DDL won...I'm so shocked! There Will Be Blood on My Left FOOT!
11:27 - Yay, Diablo Cody, the patron saint of bloggers wins!
11:15 - Will Michael Moore bring Fidel Castro? Gaydolf Titler!
11:06 - I am so happy that Atonement won something. I made applesauce for it!
11:05 - Up in Heaven: Roy Schieder is PISSED!!!! He didn't die soon enough to get included this year!
11:03 - Suzanne Pleshette passed her voice on to Mily Cyrus!
11:01 - Hillary Swank! Wiiiiiiillllllbur! I see dead people!
10:59 - There Will Be BLOOD! Bumb Bumb Bumb!
10:57 - She was great...and in 5-4-3-2-1 Who the Hell is she?
10:51 - Disney is going to be so pissed....I expect he video to cut out at any minute
10:44 - OMG....Patrick Dempsy is VERSATILE! And why is this being sung by John Mclaughlin...who is from INDIANA! And he's cute!
10:42 - I'm Penelope Cruz....I can't speak English....And the Winner is Borat! It's the Dancing with the Czar's....Oh wait...the Holocaust always win!
10:38 - Picture it, Hollywood 1940...I was wearing a scarf and birds were attacking me on the set of "The Birds"....I want Monorail!
10:37 - *snore* What is this shit?
10:35 - Robert Boyle: I would like to remember. ANYTHING!
10:31 - Cameron is SO trying to act interested in the Robert Boyle Death Watch!
10:28 - Oh Renee.....you so need eyes *thanks Blanche* The Bourne Ultimatum...I so suck on my predictions.
10:23 - Jack is so fucking old.....good lord. And I'm drunk...
10:19 - Colin Ferrell...is a bit dirty. You just know his...oh never mind
10:09 - And the Oscar goes to Helen Mirren's Tits! Gaydolf Titler! It's Forrest Witaker....Wonk Eye Weekend! Wow...they actually watched the French Film! Yay...it's the Rice Pilaf story!
10:08 - Cher!
10:05 - And the winner is...Titanic! OMG.....The Horse Blew the Shit up! 4-10
10:01 - Sound Editing...who the fuck cares about this. 4-9......
10:00 - So, is it true? The winner of Oprah's Big Give is going to be the VP for Barack Obama?
9:56 - This is so fucking pathetic.....God I miss Pushing Daisies...
9:52 - Ugh...Tranny Cyrus.....Christen Chenoweth....oh gurllllll.....
9:50 - Seriously...do we need a dramatic interpretation of the Accounting Firm....I thought we weren't going to be subjected to this shit since the Writer's Stike *drink* is over.....
9:46 - I would schtup James McAvoy....
9:44 - I love that Jessica Alba hosted the Scientific Awards...you know those nerds were jacking off at their tables. Look...a GIRL!
9:41 - Seriously, we've gone from The Rock, to Mily Cyrus, to Jessica Alba...were these all the ones who agreed to cross the picket line?
9:35 - Ruby Dee, Strong Black Woman. I love Tilda Swinton. She's paid her dues as an Actor/Actress! I'm okay to lose my prediction to her. 4 of 8
9:32 - Lady Tutli-Putli OMG...such a great drag name, and omg, do we need French winners! Oh, I picked Peter and the Wolf. So I am now 4 for 7.
9:30 - GODAMN the fucking french....Freedom Fries! Freedom Fries! 3 for 6.....ARGH! We're all stuck talking like Maurice Chevalier! (History of the World, Part I, reference)
9:29 - Owen Wilson.....ugh! I cannot stand him....
9:25 - It's Barack Obama the Musical! Yes We Can, Evita...Yes We can!
9:20 - Writer's Strike....DRINK!!!! Okay, those were funny montages! I LOVE KERRI RUSSELL!
9:16 - It's Jhud Titler! Is Phillip Seymour Hoffman channeling Chris Farley? Woo Hoo...Dixie Carter sighting...the gays are excited! It's Xavier Bardem! You better thank Julia Sugarbaker, bitch!
9:15 - Cuba! I'll take "What Have I Done With My Oscar?" for 2000 Alex....WOO HOO...JHUD!
9:08 - Art Direction....Sweeney TODD! I am starting to fail, and it is pissing me off. 3 for 5 OMG...is that Dr. Joyce Brothers! It's Gaydolph Titler!
9:07 - Have we really fallen to the point where The Rock is giving an Oscar away? The Golden Compass....my first miss of the night. 3 for 4 Look...NERRRRRRRRRRRRRRDS!
9:04 - Okay...the Mastercard commercial with the lazy eye is quite freakish....serisously!
9:01 - I hate both Michael Douglas and Catherine!...They're ickie!
9:00 - Yay! Production number! Wait....where's the production number!? I'm feeling a bit bad for her....couldn't they have done SOMETHING! Where's Rob Lowe?
8:58 - I'm 3-3 Woo Hoo!
8:56 - Please god....Let Norbit win SOMETHING! It was so robbed for Best Picture!
8:52 - Steve Carell and Anne Hathaway were mildy entertaining....Ratatouille! OMG...I spelled it right
8:51 - Okay...holy fuck...montage
8:32 - Poor Jennifer Garner....the writers didn't help her out! BITCH looks good! Elisabeth won! Wow...she's a statuesque "beauty"
8:40 - "Whenever you see a black or woman president, there's an asteroid coming to destroy the world" and Gaydolph Titler!
8:33 - Good GOD...I'm going to be drunk just during the first five minutes of the monologue. DRINK...DRINK...Drink!
8:31 - That was the same intro as last year. Look, it's sponsor'd by L'oreal Paris...because L'oreal Newark wouldn't have the same cache.
8:30 - This is where the magic happens. Wait...are the writers still on strike? *drink*
8:27 - Okay Reeg, It's Javier Bardem...not Xavier...TAKE YOUR MEDS!
8:25 - Drinking game of the night is: Every time they mention the Writer's Strike, take a drink. Regis is talking with Bill Conti the music director. He should have asked: "Bill, who are you wearing? Better yet, what the FUCK are you wearing!?!"
8:08 - *deep transvestite voice* Hi! I'm Mily Cyrus!
8:04 - Edith Piaf died....when? Yesterday? Oh Samantha, you ignorant slut!
8:00 - Regis....seriously....
746 - Kimora Lee Simmons is c-r-a-z-y!
7:32 - So far there has been nothing very inspiring dess wise, with the biggest controversy being Heidi Klum's purse doesn't match her dress. Quelle Horror! There was also Gary Busey licking Jennifer Garner's neck....this is going to be a great night. Oh, and Ryan Seacrest is a douchebag.