December 17, 2007 - 12 Days of Christmas - The Nutty Buddy (second post)

Since I missed Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, I realize that I am probably not going to get 12 days of unique gifts in, unless I double up somewhere, but for now, I bring you another in my (unintentional) series of male genital related Christmas Gifts that includes the Man Mitt and Hillary Clinton Nutcracker. I bring you:

The Nutty Buddy!

With the wonderful tag line of "Protecting the Boys", The Nutty Buddy is a state of the art athletic cup that is shatter proof and will allow the user to sustain blows (get your mind out of the gutter) to the groin without feeling any discomfort. Here are the product details, with my commentary in parens:

• Cradles the anatomy to fit and absorb hard blistering blows (blistering, huh...may need to get that checked out)
  
• Cushioned edge that is molded and built-in to match the cup's thickness. This aids in comfort and in allowing the cup to move with the body
• Ventilation for air flow (nobody likes swamp crotch...well, except bears)
  
• Tested with kicks, slides, lateral movement, speed running, sharp corner cutting, impact resistance, stopping, jumping, and ballistic movements (so I want to know how many men are talking like Minnie Mouse after the failed versions were tested?)
  
• Without a doubt the most comfortable and best fitting cup ever designed (I will take your word for it)
  
• NuttyBuddy™ is setting the standards for comfort and protection

Conveniently, the Nutty Buddy comes in sizes to accommodate all sizes of "boys." Now guys, this is not the place for ego:


The Nutty Buddy is perfect for "Baseball, Softball, Lacrosse, Hockey, Martial Arts, Paintball, Rigging, Rodeo, Football, Soccer, Roller Derby, Boxing, Skateboarding, AND Corrections Officers". (no..I am not making that up)

Also, they conveniently have a YouTube video of the Nutty Buddy being tested:


Get the Nutty Buddy today! It is a great Christmas present for those men (and some lesbians) on your list who have trouble with blows to the crotch! Of course, if you have no one that fits the bill or maybe someone who just needs some, they also offer a product called "The Boys," with the tag line "Now you can play with the boys at home or in the office!" Now, perverts, you had better realize that "The Boys" are just stress balls that you can squeeze to your hearts content.

I really wish I made most of this stuff up....